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Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Behave! Or Else!

As I mentioned previously, I have heard a lot about this particular debate recently: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/10338070/
I can understand both sides to the issue, really. I think it all boils down to respect, on both sides. Parents need to keep in mind that other people are trying to enjoy themselves and children need to learn that it's not ok for them to bother others. The children may be having a grand ol' time, but if it interferes with others' enjoyment of the establishment, parents need to rein them in. It's just good manners and teaching them to respect other's needs as well. (And if kids are running around that creates dangerous situations for both the kids and waiter/waitresses or customers walking. I've never seen this one actually happens, but it's in some of the articles I've read, so it must be a problem).
On the other hand kids are just learning manners. They won't learn how to behave in public if they aren't allowed to be there. Sure basic manners are taught at home, but they have to be put to the test sometime. And all kids, no matter how well mannered, have bad days. There are times when it's simply impossible to avoid being in public when your child is in a bad mood. The whole, take the kid out to the car til they calm down thing just is not always possible. I am not the only parent out on the buses with kids! And even when you do have a car-sometimes you have a time limit and can't wait for the child to calm down and then go back in and pick up all the things you wanted to buy again! Shopping in general is not an ideal situation for a child-it takes long, they get bored, they see all kinds of neat things they can't have, they get hungry and tired. In restaurants if the child is already hungry, waiting for food with nothing to do in the meantime is a recipie for misbehavior. If you don't have children, it's very easy to say, "You need to control your children" it's an entirely different thing once you are a parent. I take offense at the notion that all parents whose children are misbehaving are just lazy and don't care. It bothers me very much when the kids act up, but there's only so much I can control. Especially when they have limmited understanding of why they should behave and what you are telling them to do.
And as a side note, I frequenltly see adults acting in manners not respectful of others in public-if this is the example children see, well....it makes teaching them the correct way to act that much harder.

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