So I'm reading some of the comments on a babycenter article. They're always funny-you might get a few people who comment out of a genuine desire to be helpful, and a few who post with serious questions. But the vast majority seem to post out of a desire to brag or to feel better by putting others down. They often sound so rediculous that it's funny. I was reading an article today How can I give my toddler a head start on school? and it's amazing how focused we are today on raising super babies. I'm assuming this is a relatively new thing.
Especially working in the children's dept. at Barnes N Nobles, I got to observe a lot of the things parents do to help develop their children's intelligence. Books, workbooks, "smart" music, all kinds of tools so you can have a little Einstein. I really think that we are taking childhood away from kids. I'm told that to get into kindergarten today kids need to be able to write their names-didn't that used to be what kindergarten was for? I know that the cold war was when the US started pushing kids to learn earlier-out of a desire to ensure we'd be able to beat Russia. That was when they started changing the kindergarten program.
I actually read that kids who start knowing letters and reading early end up at the same level as other kids by second grade. So parents who push their kids to learn this stuff early aren't really giving them a big advantage in school. It mainly takes time away from playing and doing kid stuff. I'm not talking about kids who genuinely want to learn, there are some who are just drawn to it-in that case it's not pushing, it's developing a natural talent. There's nothing wrong with encouraging curiosity. It's when you keep going, even though the child is no longer interested-when you keep them from playing-when you stop making it fun-That's when it is about feeding the parent's ego and not helping the child.
Then there are those who take it a step farther: There's a book out now about a man who developed a sperm bank of genius sperm called THE GENIUS FACTORY by David Plotz.
Imagine a future in which women are inseminated with the sperm of Nobel laureates to help spawn a race of “super babies.” Sound far-fetched? The strange thing is, this weird-science scenario is real, and it’s part of our past. In The Genius Factory, award-winning Slate editor and columnist David Plotz tells the absorbing, unbelievable story of an eccentric millionaire, his highbrow sperm bank, and the surprising legacy it left behind. Back in 1980, tycoon Robert Graham believed America was facing a genetic catastrophe that only the spread of gifted thinkers’ seed would amend. That year, Plotz tells us, he opened the Repository for Germinal Choice, featuring a roster of Nobel winners, math geniuses, prodigies, and star athletes. After producing more than 200 children, the notoriously nicknamed “Nobel sperm bank” shuttered its doors in 1999, leaving a giant question mark as to the fate of its offspring.
He wanted to develop super children-either for the children's sake or for society's, depending on when you asked him. What's wrong with normal kids? It takes all kinds, and sometimes very very intelligent people can do some very very stupid things. People see things all different ways-why lose that? We need our forrest Gumps too! Having a race of mainly superintelligent people would not be as great as people think. I'm not going into as much detail here as i could(time constraints), but you get the idea.
Some posts from babycenter I thought were interesting and relevant to this topic:
Children...the last great daily miracle. I try not to look at parents boasting as a competition, I simply see them the way I feel in my own heart...proud, amazed, over joyed and awe struck by my childs every new move, word or action. I want to yell every one of my daughters accomplishments to the world not because I am proud of me...but because I am proud of her.
I think we all need to be a little gentler, kinder and tolerant of each other.
Each one of our children is the most wonderful, most incredible, and most brilliant person in the world...as it ought to be...and they all have a different way of expressing those qualities. Cherish each moment with them...for our time with them is brief...and when they're all grown, and we're dancing at their wedding, all that will really matter is that we gave them everything we could give them...and that they always know how much they are loved and respected for who they are and not who we expect them to be...and with that I believe anything is possible...
As a former early childhood educator and years of college, you are all right. In these days, it is important to teach your child social skills and the basics for future learning. It's okay to be proud of your children, and every once in awhile BRAG.:) An important rule of thumb, children learn in this order listening, speaking, reading, writing. Remember they still have to learn the sounds, how to spell, when to use punctuation, and a whole lot of other stuff! Teach your children the best way know. The most important thing to remember is to STAY INVOLVED with their little lives. Some of my smartest students were the ones whose parents were involved with EVERY aspect of their lives. Teaching letters, numbers, colors, etc. is important, but developing an individual who is sure of him/herself by instilling a strong sense of self is of the uptmost importance. I see too many adults who always have to prove something; are they really happy? Intelligence is part nature and part nurture; some children will never be an Einstein no matter what you do while others could receive little teaching and be a genius (a genius who surpasses the highest IG score in the world is a bouncer for a living and he's smarter than his neurosurgeon partner). Ultimately, it is not what you know, but how you apply knowledge that makes you intelligent.
I'm a Medical Doctor (Neprhologist) and I started "talking" at 2 years of age; my sister, however, started talking at 12 months and never went past a high school degree. This of course, does not mean that I'm better than her, as a matter of fact she is a very happy, well-rounded individual, but parents out there, be patient, every kid takes his own time. Don't think that because other people's kids do things before your own he/she is slow. Take heart!
I am a former school teacher of 7 yrs and I have a 17 month old son. I read to him every day, talk to him, play with him, etc... He hardly speaks 5 words, yet he "talks" all the time. He is the happiest most playfyl child I have ever been around. We do so many things together and I know he will talk and use words meaningfully when his little mind begins to let him. It's not that I am not impressed by what some other toddlers can "do", but I agree with some on here that learning isn't just about counting numbers or saying colors.
Studies show that by the time 2 children get into the 2nd grade, it is impossible to tell which child came into school knowing their basic numbers and alphabet. So basically, teaching your kids these skills so early might look cute, but it probably won't help much in the long run. It probably just makes us parents feel better about our parenting skills.
I say what's the hurry... Let your baby/toddler be that. They will get it. I have a 4 year old and he loves to be read too, and he has learn things from PLAY!! FUN PLAY. :)He is as smart as his peers that their parents started flash cards and everything else at a early age. :)
I say savor the moment while they are still little, because before long they will be in school all day/every day.
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Nope, it's not just this generation, I remember feeling the same way when you were little Steph. So many parents were pushing their children to exceed expectations even then. I thought it was bad for the children. Back when you were in school Steph, they expected you to be able to write your name by first grade plus other things, kindergarten was for learning to write. Which was totally different than the kindergarten I went to as a child. It was in first grade that I first saw the alphabet and learned it. So we didn't even learn to recognize letters much less write till first grade. Kindergarten was a first step in the process of learning--learning to be away from home, among your peers, mostly socializing and learning to accept a figure of authority. Of course you learned a lot in kindergarten. I have fond memories of making play dough lol and oh those graham cracker snacks were the best lol.
Too many times ego gets in the way of raising children, and it's the children themselves who pay, no I'm wrong because it affects the very core of our society and spreads out........so Mommies should try to stay home with their children as long as they can. I think it's so ironic that the very party--the republicans, who are supposedly so much for family values has done so much to rip them apart......I.E. look at the inflation rate, it's almost impossible for a mother to stay home and raise her children, it just costs too much in terms of rent, mortgage, food, gas, etc...
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