dream facts & tidbits

dream facts & tidbits
1. One third of our lives is spent sleeping.
2. In your lifetime, you would've spent about 6 years of it dreaming. That is more than 2,100 days spent in a different world.
3. Dreams have been here as long as mankind. Back in the Roman Era, striking and significant dreams were submitted to the Senate for analysis and interpretation.
4. Everybody dreams. EVERYBODY! Simply because you do not remember your dream does not mean that you did not dream.
5. Dreams are indispensable. A lack of dream activity can mean protein deficiency or a personality disorder.
6. We dream on average of one or two hours every night. And we often even have 4-7 dreams in one night.
7. Blind people do dream. Whether visual images will appear in their dream depends on whether they where blind at birth or became blind later in life. But vision is not the only sense that constitutes a dream. Sounds, tactility, and smell become hypersensitive for the blind and their dreams are based on these senses.
8. Five minutes after the end of the dream, half the content is forgotten. After ten minutes, 90% is lost.
9. The word dream stems from the Middle English word, dreme which means "joy" and "music".
10. Men tend to dream more about other men, while women dream equally about men and women.
11. Studies have shown that our brain waves are more active when we are dreaming than when we are awake.
12. Dreamers who are awakened right after REM sleep, are able to recall their dreams more vividly than those who slept through the night until morning.
13. Physiologically speaking, researchers found that during dreaming REM sleep, males experience erections and females experience increased vaginal blood flow - no matter what the content of the dream. In fact, "wet dreams" may not necessarily coincide with overtly sexual dream content.
14. People who are giving up smoking have longer and more intense dreams.
15. Toddlers do not dream about themselves. They do not appear in their own dreams until the age of 3 or 4.
16. If you are snoring, then you cannot be dreaming.
17. Nightmares are common in children, typically beginning at around age 3 and occurring up to age 7-8.
18. In a poll, 67% of Americans have experienced Deja Vu in their dreams, occurring more often in females than males.

NONSEQUENTIAL AGEING

Wouldn't it be nice to have the wisdom of a 93 year old combined with the life we have now?
"At 93, I would give all the treasures I had aquired through my many years of financial success, just to cuddle with that baby who simply wants me, just me. I would drag my tired bones up from my chair if that child asked to play withme. I would gladly walk to the park or just sit in the yard and watch for butterflies. There would be no place I had to go; no phone call worth interrupting this beautiful day. My slow pace and undivided attention would be all that this child required.
And then I would be 35 again, and I would be reminded that, in the end, what I will treasure most are my memories with my children. And I wll feel as though those few chaotic years I spent in my thirties vanished in an instant. Returning from my day at 93, I know I will not regret spending less time out working or working out. I will reprioritize my life so that I will embrace the joys that are in front of me and I will be thankful for the good health with which I can enjoy them."

From The Mother's Guide to the Meaning of Life: What i've Learned in My Neverending Quest to Become A Dalai Mama by Amy Krouse Rosenthal.

spoiled kids

Another Gilmore Girls related thought, on the show the mother babysat a three year old who was extremely spoiled. She told the father how to fix it, and it annoyed me because it's the same trite advice people and books generally give.
How many parents are actually stupid enough to think their kid won't love them if they say no? How many parents actually think that giving their kid everything they want will make up for other losses in their lives? That's just too dumb! Well, gee, I guess that's how all out of control kids get that way-their parents never say no and give them everything they want. Realistically it doesn't work that way, it's much more complicated.
It's like the story in a parenting magazine recently where the mom had three kids but had the third kid a while later. Her first two children were well behaved and good kids. She dispensed parenting advice to others and thought she had it all figured out. Then came the third child who turned it all upside-down! All the generic advice she had doled out came back to haunt her-none of it worked with this one. Just being firm was not enough.
For some kids it will work, but not all. Real life is much more complicated than just being firm, sticking to what you say, regularly disciplining(teaching), being a good example, etc. for some kids. Trust me, I know! I just wish it was ackowledged more often.

kid quotes

"It's frightening to think that you mark your children merely by being yourself....it seems unfair. You can't assume responsibility for everything you do-or don't do."
Simone De Beauboir

"She discovered with great delight that one does not love one's children because they are one's children but because of the friendship formed while raising them."
Gabriel Garcia Marquez

proud

Last night while I was watching Gilmore Girls, the main character, Rory, is on stage at a conference, and her parents are in the audience watching her. Her Mom whispers in a proud voice, We made her! Right out of thin air, responds her equally proud Dad.

I've had so many moments like that. Just in awe of the fact that this child came from my body! I created this little person! We made this child, together. Really neat, when you think about it.

Growing up

Leanna's all excited because Timothy was sitting up a little bit today. So I started talking to her about all the things that Justin has learned to do and all the stuff that she can do. She asked me, Mommy, can I grow up today and be all grown up? I said, no, it takes a long time to grow up. She said, you mean days and days and days?
Sometimes it seems like it's happening that quickly.

Visit with Nanny Sue, aka Hazel

We had a nice visit with Nanny Sue last night. Well, I think it was Nanny Sue-she kept claiming to be some woman named Hazel.(this was while she was helping me wash dishes Justin slept in the chair with his Daddy for most of the visit. Leanna chatted her ear off, and Timothy visited for a little before he fell asleep. Then later we made a quick trip to the Dollar General, and Nanny Sue bought: a coffee maker for me(!), a tic-tac-toe game for Leanna, a dump truck for Justin, and pain pills for Tom.
Thanks!

hearing test

Leanna had her hearing checked yesterday morning. After a long wait to get in(the old lady never called our name to check in!) we saw a very friendly lady. It was great to finally see someone who was good with kids. I've been to the doctor's office and seen various specialist in the last 4 1/2 years, and this one was the best. Leanna was shy, and that was ok. She didn't force her, and it worked. She explained what she was going to do beforehand, so Leanna wouldn't get scared. She was patient. She just had a really good manner.
She did 4 different tests on Leanna's ears. She said that everything looked fine, all well within the range of normal. She said Leanna could just be more sensitve to sound and her body than most people(that's what gets my vote) or that maybe there was a slight buildup of wax in one ear (making things sound louder in the other ear) that shifted before Leanna was tested. Leanna can be really sensitive to things that other people don't notice. The way things smell or feel in particular.
My favorite part was when the lady took just Leanna and I to a special room. She told Leanna that she would put a plug in her ear and it would draw a picture.
Ear specialist: "I bet you didn't know your ears could draw a picture! Would you like to see them make a mountain? Do you want to see your ears draw a picture?"
Leanna: "I want Cinderella! Make a picture of Cinderella!"
Ear specialist: "I can't do that, how about a nice mountain, that's what we like to see."
Leanna(earnestly):"No, I really like Cinderella."

Afterward she gave Leanna a sticker and let Leanna pick a little toy for her and one for Justin. Leanna slowly considered her options. The lady asked, which one do you think your brother would like? Leanna said, "Well, he really likes colorful things, "...........and she chose a green dinosaur for him. She chose a fish for herself. I wish all doctors were that patient and understanding.

little kids are draining, sometimes.

Justin's been asking to hold the baby in his arms lately. It's really sweet to see him get excited about his brother. Even though he always has to wait for me while I take care of Timothy first, he's still clearly attached to him. I did worry that he might really resent Timothy because of that. I'm sure he does resent it to some extent, but I guess it's not enough to make him not like the baby.
While I do want more kids, I want a break for a while. I've tried explaining to Tom that it wouldn't be fair to Timothy or Justin to have another baby soon. They both need me so much yet, and then there's the question of my sanity. At times it's hanging by a thread, a worn piece of thread, and I think another baby would completely break it. It'd be different if I had more help, or even just more breaks.
Don't get me wrong-I don't regret the kids or their spacing. I wouldn't do it any differently. But I'd be lying if I said it wasn't hard. I really do feel that it will get easier as they get a bit older. It takes a lot of hard work in the early years, that hopefully will pay off later. So I don't expect to do major projects now, to do anything that takes a long time or long period of concentration. I just wish I could get through to Tom that even just a little time away-a quick walk-can be enough to recharge my energy. No matter how I say it he just doesn't seem to understand that. I think that time to yourself is really important, no matter if you work or stay at home. It should be interesting to see what happens once Leanna is at school. I don't know if having one less kid during the day will make it easier or harder-She does help keep Justin occupied and I know he will miss her.

links

A few links, in case anyone's interested:
Organic diet reduces pesticide levels in children's bodies
DUH?!! Why is that surprising?

Moms feel stressed even during "free" time
Another duh!

Formula recall:
(Thank God I don't need to worry about this! Hopefully no one reading this does!)

THURSDAY, Feb. 23 (HealthDayNews) — The U.S. Food and Drug Administration has issued a nationwide recall for some Gentlease powdered infant formula that may contain metal particles up to 2.7 millimeters in size.
The recall affects 41,464 24-ounce cans of formula with lot number BMJ19, use by 1 Jul 07, which can be found on the bottom of the can. Anyone with a can from this batch of formula should not use the product and should contact manufacturer Mead Johnson at (888) 587-7275.

Miscarriage & stress

Pregnant women who are stressed out during the first three weeks after conception are nearly three times as likely to miscarry, a new study finds. They measured cortisol, a stress-linked hormone. In all, miscarriages occurred in 90 percent of pregnancies in which the women had increased cortisol levels and in 33 percent of those with normal cortisol levels.
Most pregnancy losses take place in the first three to four weeks after conception.
Nepomnaschy said it's unclear why a boost in cortisol might raise miscarriage risks, but he offered a hypothesis: "The body might interpret that [increased cortisol level] as conditions deteriorating, and maybe that might trigger an abortion mechanism."

Makes sense to me.

Bedtime prayers

Last night my Mom asked Leanna about bedtime prayers. Leanna told her that she wanted to pray to Laura. Naturally, my Mom found this a bit puzzling. But no, Leanna didn't want to pray to God or to the Lord, it had to be Laura. Finally she figured out why. When Leanna eats at my Mom's house, my Mom thanks "the lord" for the food. Apparently all this time Leanna thought she had been thanking Laura for the food! LOL!!

So today I was at my parents' house and Laura was over too. Leanna ran over to her and told her, I want to pray to you! Laura said, "You mean you want to pray FOR me? Not TO me!" And Leanna said, "NO. I want to pray to you!" And with that, she ran off to play. Then my Mom told us the story. : )

the real words

For my Mom, who has trouble remembering(which causes her to make up her own, more annoying lyrics):

Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack
All dressed in black, black, black
With silver buttons, buttons, buttons
All down her back, back, back
She asked her mother, mother, mother
For fifty cents, cents, cents
To see the elephant, elephant, elephant
Jump the fence, fence fence
They jumped so high, high, high
They touched the sky, sky, sky
And didn't come back, back, back
Till the fourth of July, July, July
Contributed by Angela Martin and Heidi Wallis

Or, add to the end the following lines:

He jumped so high, high, high
He touched the sky, sky, sky
And he never came back, back, back
Till the fourth of July, July, July!
Contributed by T. Stivers
http://www.gameskidsplay.net/jump_rope_ryhmes/jump_miss_mary_mack.htm

I love you!

I guess Tom and Justin made up.....a minute ago Tomwas holding Justin upsidedown, behind his back and Justin's yelling"Daddy, I love you!"


(Then again, maybe he's just really smart and he said it to get Tom to put him down!)

poll

Just curious-what do you guys think of this picuture? It's Britney Spears, post baby. I think her son has the same birthdate that I do.
Not that that is related to anything.

Leanna's new(self-proclaimed)nickname

sparkybarkylalatickilakingmarketer

Sometimes I don't understand men!

Geez-Justin falls down and Tom yells at him for making noise! I'm pretty sure that given a choice, Justin wouldn't have wanted to fall(thus causing the noise), but try explaining that to a man! This one, anyway.

Doctor visit again

Timothy's 15 lbs. 1 oz, and I think 25 inches long. He's in the 75th percentile for height, around 50th for weight. He had 4 shots, didn't cry for the first two. Then he started getting angry and cried only until I picked him up. That's Leanna again.
Leanna's 36 lbs.-they checked her eye one last time. I also asked about her ear because she's mentioned that things sound loud in one ear. So they attempted to do a hearing test, just to check. No luck though, she wouldn't cooperate. So we had to make an appt. for the regular hospital to have them do the kind of test you don't have to cooperate for. Probably the same kind they do on newborns.

Rub-a-dub-dub, two kids need to visit the tub

The giggles comming from the kitchen are infectious. Much like Jaime's son, Jonathan, my kids have been longing to play with water lately. (see her blog: http://jonathanstaniec.blogspot.com) Justin's never stopped trying to drink the water in the tub since the time he got his first bath.
Usually this just means I have a mess to mop up on the kitchen floor. It doesn't matter where you put the water-in the sink, in a container on top of like, 12 towels-the floor is always covered in water before they're done. This time they've pulled a chair up to the sink and as best as I can tell are just pouring the water on the floor and each other. It's keeping them amused.
Hmmmm, Leanna claims that Justin poured the water on his own head, but somehow, I doubt that.

Birth order

I've always thought birth order studies were interesting, but now they're interesting to me in a whole new way. Now I'm looking at them with my kids in mind instead of me and my sisters.
In case you don't know, the birth order theory refers to: "the idea that your spot in the family has an influence on who you are--everything from your personality traits to your overall IQ. In other words, the eldest child in a given family should be expected to exhibit certain traits, the youngest child certain other traits, and so on.
In fact, some people put such stock in birth order that they credit it--and the sibling rivalry it can lead to--for changing history. "
There are lots of other factors that can influence this though-as the author points out: "A parent can die; a hurricane can leave us homeless; we can contract a life-threatening disease. Any one of these things will probably have more of an effect on our personalities than the presence of siblings. And, birth order aside, people are born with certain temperaments that can affect how they respond to others."

Here's the link, there are 3 pages. I like the stuff about family rivalry in the Bush family. It's kind of funny to picture the president of the US pouting because Mommy & Daddy like his brother more.

http://encarta.msn.com/encnet/features/Columns/?Article=birthordermain

little skaters

Last night Justin and Leanna were running back and forth through the downstairs, over and over. They were "skating." We watched them for a bit and Tom asks me, "Were they like this all day?" And I said, "This is peaceful!" And it was, for me. Because they were entertaining themselves in a way that caused no damage to our property or made extra messes for me to clean!
Then after I said that I realised that it would be a strange kind of peace, to anyone else.

This will make you smile

A link, from Jaime:

http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=15930

Aunt Claire with long hair and Jupiters

Happy baby Timothy

Box

Along the same vein as the last post-more examples of great imagination. Today Leanna and Justin were playing spaceship. They were sitting in this little box, sometimes together, sometimes just Justin. Leanna was decorating the box with a pen and pretending to use nailpolish on it. I told her she should go visit Pop-Pop J. at the paint store to really paint it. So she agreed. She told me they were going to fly the spaceship to the paint store with Pop-Pop, then to Walmart, and then to the doctor's. They were playing with this box for quite a while. It's funny, isn't it? There are a lot of really great new toys and it's nice to have a variety of them, but you just can't beat a good old fashioned box for entertainment!

My little helpers

My house will never truly be dirty. I can say that with confidence because my kids insure that dust can't settle for long on anything within chair's reach of their hands. They clear things out every now and then. Tonight my little helpers took everything off several shelves in the pantry. (So I cleaned the shelves before restocking them.) Then Leanna decided to "help" by rearranging all the canned goods, all over the place. Justin took all the garbage bags out of the containers and put them all over the floor downstairs. They had a little play fight with them, so I couldn't really be mad. Justin also helped me ensure that my spices never get old by dumping about half of two containers onto the floor. In case you were wondering, I was taking care of the baby in the living room while they were doing this. At another point Leanna and Justin started playing with all the lids to the pots and pans. I didn't care because it kept them busy and they were playing nicely together and using their imaginations. Leanna came over to me, wearing two lids as shoes. Her feet actually fit inside the handles. Then she came over to me carrying two lids and told me that she bought these in that store over there(the kitchen) for my children because she thought they liked them. She said they cost $80.00. Then she told me that she had more she was going to buy for her husband and daughter and son. She had this whole storyline she made up about the pots and pans! She has such a great imagination.

music to a Mom's ears

http://www.mommymommy.com/sounds.html

42 things parenthood has taught me by Amy Rosenthal
http://www.mommymommy.com/42b.html
(I especially like the one: Sometimes you can love your sister so much that you just have to punch her) (it will not be funny with MY kids though.)

Link for Maree

Maree's school made this page: http://www.eastonsd.org/palmer/Third%20Grade/geee/Black%20History/Black%20History.html

Her voice can be heard if you click on Rosa Parks.

hmmm...interesting

kids and tv-not so harmful?

http://www.slate.com/id/2136372/nav/tap1/?GT1=7838

My husband

The other night Tom came by while I was typing here and he asked why I didn't have any pictures of him here. Mainly because the blog is more about me and the kids. I spend more time with them than I do with him.
So here is a nice picture of him. Just to counteract some of the less than flattering things I've mentioned on my blog:
He's a very hard worker, and he does good work.
He's always nice to people-volunteering to help even when he shouldn't.
He charges people less because he feels sorry for them.
He loves all kids, and his in particular.
I'd write more but Justin's crying for Mommy right now and he's waking the baby! Anyway, he's a really nice guy!

Cooking

I have a confession to make. I've started to take advantage of Maree's obsession with food. I let her make breakfast yesterday morning for her, Tom, and Leanna. She said her Mom lets her make eggs, so I let her make eggs and I told her how to make bacon. Leanna said she wanted the kind of eggs that come with toast. (She meant scrambled eggs on top of toast) She likes to cook, and personally I hate the smell of eggs cooking! So it seemed like a good idea. She had fun and Tom didn't have to wait for me to finish feeding the baby before making his food, or even have to (the horror!) hold the baby while I made it. Everyone seemed happy with the results.

I let her make pork chops the last time she was over. I stood right by her and talked her through it(even let her add too much egg because she thought it needed more, so she'd learn for next time). It's a little thing, not very complicated, but she bragged that she'd made dinner! And it was well worth it cause Tom even came and sat at the table with us-and he never does that! (You'd think with the 50 million commercials about the importance of the family table on the TVland channel that he watches all the time-he'd do it at least semi-regularly!) I know Korinna lets her do some stuff and knows that Maree loves to pretend to cook and watches the food channel-but I still worry that Korinna might get upset that I have her making food. You never know what might set her off, you know? Sometimes it's not so easy to be in charge of a child not your own.

kids and weddings

I asked my cousin to please NOT have a no-kids wedding. I had to miss two weddings this year because of no-kids weddings, and especially in the case of my cousin Ronnie, I really would have liked to be there. Lukily she said of course kids could come! Chrissy said she wasn't even aware that you could do something like that! She said she loves to see the funny things they do at weddings. We were in total agreement, kids are part of life and a wedding is a celebration of life. I mean, I wasn't thrilled that Leanna decided to cry for veggie crackers during the family blessing-the part of the ceremony that I wrote!-but it wasn't that big a deal. And frankly I didn't mind that I had to carry her down the aisle because it took some attention off me! I thought it was really cute to see all the little girls dancing in a circle at our wedding reception. It's great that all those kids can have happy family memories like that.
(And yes, I know why Tom's cousin's wedding was no kids allowed-it's ok. ) I've actually missed three weddings in a row-my cousin Ryan's(too close to my due date for Justin) and Tom's cousin Jason, and my cousin Ryan. Laura said that Chrissy will have to give me nine months notice for her wedding to make sure we can come!

Sleeping beauties

Maree and I were looking through pictures tonight, and we thought that this one was really cute because they look alike here. Timothy really reminds me of baby Leanna a lot.

Cousin Chrissy

This is my newly engaged cousin Chrissy with Justin. They bonded. Not the best picture of her, but my Mom took it(our camera is still in the shop). Chrissy also said she couldn't get over how much Justin looks like me. (Ha ha, Tom!)

Her longtime boyfriend Travis proposed to her on Valentine's Day after dinner. Apparently his game plan was to wait for the right moment to pop the question but Chrissy kept ruining it with innappropriate comments. She didn't want the whole story recorded, but my favorite part of the story was when he romantically took her hand in an attempt to do it and she asked him, "Do you want to pull my finger?" So romantic!
Now that's a story for the grandkids!

Shirts

I bought these shirts from Target with Christmas money given by my Aunt Karen. Although they are for boys, the grey shirt fit Leanna so perfectly that I had to get it!
Leanna's says, "I have decided to put myself in charge." And Justin's says, "I"m definitely up to something."
So very appropriate for both of them!!

Leanna's Valentine to Tom

It says, Dear Daddy,
You are the wonderful Daddy ever. Your love is special to me.
Love, Leanna

(Looks just like Tom, doesn't it?)

V-day present

In case anyone wondered, Tom didn't bring home a baby for Valentine's Day. I got a rose instead. Much easier to care for!

Cute

If you blow rasberries on Timothy's feet he will laugh and laugh.
So would most people though, I imagine. If they weren't really surprised by it. Or disturbed.

Bye Bye!

Justin gets a kick out of pretending to be leaving. He says, "Bye Bye! Luv ya!" and then he smiles real big. If you actually appear to leave him though, he starts to cry. I think he enjoys the power of being the one leaving you, not the reverse.

Weddings

I think it's really strange how many children's shows there are about weddings. I mean, I understand that it's difficult to promote healthy marriage in a children's show. And I do think that that is a specific goal in some of these shows. The things you could show that that represent a happy healthy marriage would go over their heads(Not that I think you shouldn't show them. I'm talking about stuff like husbands/wives purposely being considerate of each other, talking nicely to each other, giving hugs, etc). The only way they know to promote marriage is to show a big wedding. Our culture has this way of promoting weddings-as though the wedding itself is the high point of the marriage. And sadly it often is. We don't prepare people to deal with the life that comes after. I don't think teaching little girls to fantasize about weddings is the ideal way to promote marriage. If anything it contributes to this fantasy that helps with the divorce rate.
It's really weird to hear Leanna talking about weddings. Which she does occasionally. Leanna wants to marry Timothy right now. Before that it was me and sometimes Maree. Her understanding of the concept is very limmited.
Though to be fair, my understanding of what marriage means it still being developed as well.
:)

comic relief

I sit, rocking the baby to sleep. Justin slumbers quietly on the couch. Tom watches tv. Leanna breaks the peace and relative silence, running over to me and yelling excitedly, "Mommy guess what! I was counting my toes....."
At this point I begin laughing hysterically and Tom begins grinning. I can't stop laughing, it just strikes me funny that she was sitting there, counting her toes. And she's so excited about it! She goes on to show me that she has seven toes-Tom prods for more information and she shows him how she counts them. (One, two three, four, seven!) and then she counts the other foot(one, two three, four, five!), the first foot just mysteriously has seven toes, I guess. This kid's been counting since 18 months, but the practical application still eludes her sometimes. Then Tom asks her what comes after two million. She gives him one of those, Oh Daddy! looks and says, "I don't know. You guess."

stuff

My coffee maker is broken! It just completely stopped working. Mommy needs coffee. :(

I mopped the kitchen floor three times today and you can't even tell. Justin was in the coffee twice(all over the floor) and kept taking his diaper and pants off. We've had two sucessful times on the potty, but today he just kept watching it come out(and I had to clean it up afterwards).
And Leanna and I finally got to paint her care bears, a christmas present she's been looking forward to! I got it online, through Lakeside. The paint was really cheap though, it was running right off the bears. But Leanna enjoyed it immensly so it didn't really matter. And she wasn't willing to just paint the bears one color like the picture and instructions showed you to. She painted two bears, as did I. She is creative-her bears were all the colors there were. I'll have to borrow my Mom's camera and take pictures of them to post later. Our camera is in the shop.
:( We've had a string of bad luck lately. But anyway, she's been longing to paint these bears since she got them. Tonight was the first chance I had to do them with her(Both brothers managed to sleep long enough for us to get it done). Now I have to go look up pinworms cause the topic came up and Tom says, "maybe they'll have pictures of butts with worms comming out!" So he wants me to look them up. No lie.

quotes

"You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance."

Franklin P. Adams

"Children are not things to be molded, but are people to be unfolded."
-- Jesse Lair


"Having children is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain." -- Alan Bleasdale


"The beauty of 'spacing' children many years apart lies in the fact that parents have time to learn the mistakes that were made with the older ones-which permits them to make exactly the opposite mistakes with the younger ones." -- Sydney J. Harris


"Modern cynics and skeptics ... see no harm in paying those to whom they entrust the minds of their children a smaller wage than is paid to those to whom they entrust the care of their plumbing." -- John Fitzgerald Kennedy

"The only reason I always try to meet and know the parents better is because it helps me to forgive their children."-- Louis Johannot

When in doubt, make a fool of yourself. There is a microscopically thin line between being brilliantly creative and acting like the most gigantic idiot on earth. So what the hell, leap. -- Cynthia Heimel

Wait, I have to include a quote from the great Dave Barry!

"If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base." -- Dave Barry

language is fun

I'm sorry, apologies for the language, but this one just cracks me up. So I'm glancing through a slang dictionary(Language fascinates me) and I come across this phrase. I mean, what colorful person came up with this-

"shit a cold purple Twinkie" v 1. to react with extreme or irrational distress or composure; FREAK OUT, HAVE A FIT. ("When he hears you've been cheating on him, he's going to shit a cold purple Twinkie.") Submitted by Anthony, Hazlet, NJ, USA, 06-12-2002.
http://www.ocf.berkeley.edu/~wrader/slang/s.html
Just the image this conjures! I mean, it 's not even going to be warm-it's a COLD purple twinkie!

recent favorite pics of Leanna

This one is my favorite

Scary stuff

I go to this site because sometimes it can be really funnny, and I need all the laughs I can get! But this scares me, it really does. When you read it, it's easy to laugh and say, Wow, those are really bad parents, what a shame. But the reality is that these are fairly typical for myspace for kids their age-it makes you wonder how to avoid having your kid be writting something like that. Myspace is a website where you can blog, list your likes and dislikes and have people send you comments and it often acts as a dating service-it's VERY popular. My guess would be to have your kid be involved in something(sports, music, dance, etc.)they enjoy that fills their time, and to have strong family ties. Involved parents and grandparents. Any thoughts?
PS. Claire especially, I'd like to hear from on this one!

Bobby Brown has great kids
Bobby Brown's children are big fans of myspace. Unfortunately for Bobby, they're also big fans of getting wasted and writing about it. The myspace profile of Bobby's 16-year-old daughter, LaPrincia - whose mom is Brown's ex-girlfriend Kim Ward - lists her favorite alcoholic beverage as Smirnoff raspberry vodka, and answers questions such as: Would you ever be an exotic dancer? - "Ohh yess," LaPrincia answers. Have you ever danced like a whore? - "Yess all the time." She also confesses to streaking, kissing a girl and skinny-dipping. Fourteen-year-old Bobby Jr. - also Ward's child - boasts on myspace that "i can read but i choose not to." Twelve-year-old Bobbi Kristina, Bobby's daughter with Whitney, used the screen name "nimpho babby," and wrote: "i love swimmin with hot guys lol (memories), i love makingout, i love cheerleading, i love driving, and last but not least i love BOYS, BOYS, BOYS!!!!!!!!"
Yikes. If you're Bobby Brown, and you discover that your twelve-year-old daughter uses "nimpho babby" as a screen name, likes driving and tongue-wrestling hot guys, you tell her that a) she shouldn't be driving - unless daddy's drunk, b) "nympho" is spelled with a "y", c) she better flush the toilet before mommy drowns. Those are apparently the only options. At this point Bobby would lose a father-of-the-year award to Chronos.

This is from www.thesuperficial.com

For the single gals....

http://www.mailorderhusbands.net/order/

Holly Hobbie

Does anyone remember Holly Hobbie?
Guess what, she's back. "She's the great-Granddaughter of the beloved Holly you grew up with." LeAnn Rimes sings her theme song. It's not the same, I much prefer the old-fashioned Holly Hobbie, but maybe I'm just showing my age.
www.hollyhobbieandfriends.com

Awww, and there's a line of Holly Hobbie baby stuff too! See I have to have another girl! (Eventually) http://www.hollyhobbie.com/HollyHobbie/hollyforkids.do

More fun with Justin

Gave all 3 kids a bath tonight-no mean feat in itself! We had a moment of panic when Leanna found a brown spot in the tub. The baby was screaming and I had to quicky get Leanna and Justin out of the tub. (We thought Justin had pooped in the tub). Lukily it turned out to be only an M&M he had snuck into the tub with him. He has this obsession with throwing things in water. Although this time I think he just smuggled them in his hand. He's thrown pretzels into the water for scrubbing the kitchen floor, he puts toys in your drink, and I did find a couple M&Ms in my coffee once.

Sue Jr.

As soon as I took this picture of Leanna, it reminded me so much of her Nanny Sue! I know we have more than one picture of Sue with her tounge out, so I tried to find a picture in the same pose. This was the best I could do.

blah

Yesterday was a bad day. It started discovered that I had accidentally bought the wrong kind of creamer for my coffee-Amaretto-yuck! If anyone wants it, let me know! The baby and Justin were both fussy. After I got the baby to sleep, Justin was in my lap, when he got up to get something, Leanna climbed in. Then she and Justin were fighting over who got to sit there. Justin's been taking his diaper off a lot lately, twice during the day yesterday. Then later he reached in and pulled out some poop, and brought it over to me. Lovely.
And we went into the bathroom to attempt another sit on the potty, but instead Justin ran in and grabbed the toilet brush, spraying yucky water everywhere! So I had to take him and the baby downstairs to their father(who was not happy about this) so I could clean up the mess in the bathroom. It was just one of those days where nothing at all gets done. All I did was hold the kids, make them food, and clean up spills. It's very frustrating when you can't do anything at all.
I'm pretty sure Timothy is teething-not only is he more cranky but there's lots of drool and I keep finding clothing or his bibs in his mouth(the texture probably feels good on his gums). I got Justin to sleep early, triumph #1. Leanna was very grouchy, I could tell she was tired all day long. So I snuggled with her on the couch and pretty soon she was asleep. Triumph #2! Ah, peace finally right? Well, I did manage to get a shower but before I even get out the baby wakes up all cranky again. And he woke up Justin again. So naturally after he goes back to sleep Leanna peed on the couch in her sleep. She sleeps so deeply that it doesn't wake her up. She still wears a diaper to bed even though she's been potty trained since sometime between 2 and 1/2 and 3 years old. When she did wake up she was spouting gibberish. She was getting all upset because the words weren't coming out right-she was repeating herself and not making any sense. What she finally told me was that my pj pants looked like half a sheep.

Then for a finale, after I get Leanna cleaned up, all three kids wake up and insist on having me hold them. And Tom dissapears up to the third floor to mess around with computers, leaving me to deal with it alone again.
So if you were one of the people who called yesterday-I didn't answer the phone at all because either I had a child in my lap or it was too noisy for me to hear anyway. Now you know why.

Checking in with my readers

Tom wants me to say "HI" to his Dad.

Announcing Mr. Big Boy!

Justin used the potty for the first time today!

Yes, I know it's early, I'm not getting my hopes up that it'll be a regular thing yet. Still a triumph. : )

Timothy and Leanna

It's hard to get pictures of Timothy alone-Leanna insists on poking her face into the pictures!

Just goofing around-my wild child

Yay! It worked!

This time it worked-it let me upload a picture! This shows Leanna's red eye.

Timothy has a checkup on the 23rd, so they'll check her eye again then. The doctor wanted us to make a separate appt. even after we told him we had one comming up for our son. The receptionist had no problem adding Leanna's name to Timothy's appt. though. Just shows that they're really after more money. (Separate appt. =more money for them. And wasted time for us)

plans, anyone?

Is anyone actually doing anything for Valentine's Day?

Valentine's Day Gift

So last night I told Tom that I knew what he could give me for Valentine's Day-I told him to guess. Do you know what one of his guesses was? A baby! A baby! That tops the list of things I do not need right now. I have my hands quite full and my sanity it teetering on the brink! A baby! Geez.
(All I wanted was a back rub!)

Fun phases

While Leanna's on a maturing streak, Justin's in a phase where he's been hitting and throwing things. I can't wait until it passes. It better pass. We've lost several glasses to it. And Leanna got a scratched eye. Although I guess that's pretty minor considering all the torture she's given him.

True Love

In honor of the upcoming Valentine's day, I thought I'd post this entry from a librarian's blog. Talk about sweet. I can't picture Tom doing this, he'd be too embarrassed. And they say chivalry is dead!

True Love
Last week a confused-looking man came into the library looking for books for his wife. Romance books. She doesn't want anything "dated" (published prior to 1990) and she's read through Nora Roberts (a small feat unto itself). She just sent this poor guy to get "more books" and didn't give him any authors to work with. This is where I come in. My librarians don't really try with this sort of question anymore because "Hey, Wendy reads romance! Let's ask Wendy!" In all fairness I do this same thing. The minute a science fiction question comes in I run to the my children's librarian.Well we were crazy nuts busy, and given the woman's love for La Nora, I walked through the shelves and pulled off books by other Big Names. Jayne Ann Krentz, Linda Howard - you get the idea.Husband came back tonight. Wife liked those books but she wants "more romance" and *hushed whisper* "more sex." Bless this poor guy's heart. He must really love his wife. I bet he buys tampons for her too.So we went to the paperback section and I pulled out several more contemporary romances. One of the authors? Shannon McKenna. That should fulfill the more sex requirement me thinks.
7 Comments -
Nicole said...
Yes, that has to be true love.Though maybe he's getting something out of it. *grin*
4:46 AM
Sybil said...
LOL he is so not married ;)hee or what nicole said... See I need a job like yours, where I can help people!
5:42 AM
Jay said...
lol that is too cute. awww.
8:50 AM

Bookseller Chick said...
I still remember the first time I ran into a guy from my old high school in the romance section. At first I didn't recognize him because this huge ex-football player, class clown was the last person I would expect buying romance. I quietly asked him if I could help in find anything, and the next thing I know I've got 200 lbs of panicked male on my hands. "You've got to help me! Stacie said to buy the newest books for her, but I don't know what they are!"Stacie was his girlfriend of four years, and it was only in that moment I realized how much he really loved her. Not only did he know (basically) what she already had, but he could name her likes and dislikes. Changed my whole perspective on the guy.Cheers to your man in the library.
9:53 AM
Tara Marie said...
What a man!!!!!
4:10 PM

Old Stuff

Tom worked with Tom on Friday and Saturday cleaning out this elderly woman's basement. So he got paid some money and could take what he wanted that she got rid of. So he got these tool chests that look brand new(but are full of old tools-the kind you pay at least $300 for at Sears), and this old steamer trunk. It has the woman's baby clothes and an old old baby rattle. It's neat to see. He was trying to look up the trunk online to see if it's worth anything. It doesn't have a name on it though. Not that it matters if it is worth anything, we just like the look of it. And the fact that it's really old. It still had tags on it from when the lady went to France. It's fun to just think of where it's been, the history it has. Tom said it put him in the mood to go to flea markets and look for antiques. We didn't though, he just watched Roadshow Antiques on PBS, lol.

haircut

Tom cut his own hair last night. I was about to tell him he looks like his brother but lukily I stopped before the words came out. He would have been upset!
This is what happens when you stay up until 4:30AM-you cut your own hair possibly a tad too short! Since he always wears a hat it won't matter much anyway though.

Happy Baby

Timothy is growing up too. He's still a very smiley baby. He's at the stage where he babbles a lot. He wakes me up babbling away. Very animated with his arms too. One of the addictive things about babies is the way they look at you with this pure love in their eyes. For doing nothing but being you. It just fills you with happiness.

food

We had a good day with food in our house today. Leanna ate all her supper-even the vegetables! And it wasn't even a separate meal! (We had ham, broccoli, califlower, and potatoes) Then later she made and ate scrambled eggs! It's been a while since she would eat eggs! Justin had cereal and some fruit-not junk food! This is a real triumph in our house! Preparing food is no fun at all because most of the time it isn't eaten. It's terribly difficult to find something the kids will eat, and my husband's not much better. There is nothing besides pizza that everyone will eat. So I'm just thrilled that Leanna ate well today.

She's growing up so fast......

Leanna's been maturing a bit-right under my nose. I didn't notice it myself, my Mom mentioned it the other night and I realized that she was right. It's subtle, but definitely there. Sometimes I look at her and I think I catch a glimpse of what she'll look like when she's older. It'll be really interesting to see what kind of person she turns out to be.
She's going to be ready for school, which is good. Every once in a while she tries to write letters. And she's starting to get good at identifying them(without our practicing them). She gets really happy when she gets the letter right. It's cute. I wasn't ready for school at her age, but then I was a lot quieter than she is. I love to hear her pretend to read stories, she really is creative. If she can mind the teacher and rein in her energy than she'll do fine in school. The time really flew by......

different languages

I'm not married as long, but I have to agree with the idea that men and women do speak different languages. When Tom says, "I'll help you clean" it does not mean what I assume it to mean. And I've learned that when he says, "I'm really hungry" what he actually means is, Get me some food, woman! But that doesn't mean that I don't still pretend I haven't figured this out-it buys me time until he actually comes out and asks, can you make me lunch? Shh.

From this blog: http://www.melanielynnehauser.com/wordpress/

February 2, 2006
What We Have Here is a Failure to Communicate
Filed under: General — Melanie Lynne Hauser @ 12:07 pm
I have the best husband in the world. Seriously. He told me so. I’m blessed in many, many ways — DAH makes me laugh, holds me when I cry, doesn’t make fun of my many experimental attempts to sport the Ultimate Cute Hair. He’s the go-to guy when we have stopped up toilets, when the trash needs to be taken out, when there are dead animals in the driveway. (That sounds weird, doesn’t it? I’m talking about the occasional dead chipmunk or mole, not zebras and elephants.)
But.
After 18 years of marriage (I married at a very young age, of course. Before I could drive, practically. Ahem.), I am still perplexed by the fact that at times we seem to speak different languages. For example, anything I say can be interpreted, in DAH language, as a sexual innuendo. (Me: Can you change the light bulb over the kitchen sink? DAH: You want me to change your light bulbs? (accompanied by adolescent giggles).
For years, he would say things like, “Let’s go look at TV’s.” (Or “a new car,” or “a new stove,” etc.) And I’d jump up and down with excitement, grab the checkbook, accompany him — only to find out that we were, literally, going to go look at TV’s. For hours on end. And then leave empty-handed and go back home to watch our old TV, which looked crappier than ever after a day spent at Best Buy. And then he’d seem to forget about the whole thing, and he’d never talk about TV’s again. This happened all the time — I was like Charlie Brown, forever falling for Lucy’s promise that she’d hold the football for him. Finally — I think it was about year 15 — I figured out what he was really saying, stopped getting excited, and told him to go look at TV’s his own damn self.
But there’s one language difference I can never get used to. It has to do with the word “help.”
Back in the summer, when I was really busy for the book launch, we splurged and hired a cleaning service to come in every two weeks. It was heaven. Heaven, I tell you! It was so wonderful to know that, no matter how horrible the house got, angels would swoop in every two weeks and magically take care of it all.
But right around Christmas, we decided to discontinue this service, for a variety of reasons. So we said good-bye to the angels. And DAH said to me (and I wrote it down, word for word, just to have as evidence in any eventual divorce proceedings), “Don’t worry, honey. I’ll help clean.”
I naively interpreted this as — DAH would help. Clean. Actually pick up a Swiffer or a vacuum cleaner now and then.
Now, though, a couple of months into our unholy pact, I realize that to DAH, “I’ll help clean” really meant, “I’ll ignore layers of dust and piles of dishes and won’t complain when you’re too busy to provide me with clean underwear — I’ll just go without. And by not complaining — nay, not even noticing — how horrific the house is, I’m being a good husband and cutting you some slack.”
Now, he actually has a point. Because I happen to know some women — otherwise smart, educated women — whose husbands expect a pristine house in exchange for allowing them to stay home and raise their kids and volunteer in the community and do all the yard work. (Mighty big of them, isn’t it?) I’ve had some of these women tell me horrifying tales of what their husbands expect. Like — sparkling windows! Polished floors! Clean sheets EVERY week! One woman even told me that her husband doesn’t want her to go away again (she’d gone for a short vacation with friends, just over the weekend) because he couldn’t eat anything but her cooking.
Well, if I had a husband like that — actually, I wouldn’t. Because he would have divorced me minutes after I removed both his testicles.
So in that respect, I know that I’m fairly fortunate to have a husband as understanding as DAH. (Excuse me while I go wipe tears of laughter from my eyes.) And truly, I have learned, after 18 years, a few things about the man. It’s not merely that he sees the mess and chooses to ignore it because he loves me and doesn’t want me to work too hard.
It’s that he doesn’t mind it. And I guess I don’t know how I can expect a man who thinks the crusty yellow rings around the toilet are decorative accents to consider cleaning them up. But the thing is — I do mind it. And it weighs on me, until I just can’t stand it anymore and then I go on a mad cleaning frenzy. And you know what?
He doesn’t comment about that, either.
So I give up. We don’t speak the same language, and obviously we don’t see the same pictures. It’s like a Rorschach test — shown the same drawing we would see different things. I already know that I see the glass half empty, he sees it half full. So I see the house on the verge of being swallowed into the black hole of its own chaos. He sees it as “charmingly lived in.”
DAH’s a great guy. Really. And he has been allowed to keep both of his testicles. And that’s saying a lot, because I’m fairly picky about that sort of thing. So I’ll keep him. And I guess I’ll keep trying to teach him my language, and he’ll keep trying to teach me his.
(The language of love, I can just hear him say. Accompanied by adolescent giggles.)
Comments (7)

Memory tricks

Isn't it funny how people remember things so differently? I've heard my Aunts and Uncles and my Mom argue with my grandmother over the way things were when they were kids. My grandmother says that if you listened to her kids she must have lived like a queen because her kids did all the work in the house! And they counter that they did a lot more work in that house than she remembers! Another example-my grandmother claims all her kids were potty trained before they were a year old. Yet she tells a story about my mother at age two, taking off her diaper and wandering the streets. Hmmm. (In case you are wondering, a nice couple brought her back before she got too far).
Tom doesn't read my blog. Generally his reading is limmited to what is in the bathroom. But I did read him a few sections, like the one where his mother talks about tv-viewing when he was a kid. What's funny is that he remembers things entirely differently. He says there were two tvs in the house. He knows this because he had to watch Thundercats(remember that anyone?) on the tv in his Mom's bedroom. He claims he watched MTV all the time and that his Mom knew about it! He always watched Headbanger's Ball. So did my Dad, by the way.
And he said that his Dad always let them watch anything, topless women and all, as long as their Mom wasn't around. Then he fondly reminiced about how he used to watch GI Joe, and how it was boring until they added a lot of violence . Then he really liked it!
Makes me wonder what my kids will remember about their childhoods. This blog might really come in handy! (You did too say that! I can look it up, it's all in my blog!)

Questions from Leanna

Leanna asked me tonight,"if all the people had people on top of them, than we'd have more space, right?"
She does have an interesting mind.

Red eye

We had an unexpected trip to the doctor's office today. Justin's been hitting a lot lately, he thinks it's funny and I've having trouble making him understand it hurts. We kept warning Leanna not to laugh when Justin would hit her-one day when he hits, it's going to hurt! Of course she doesn't listen! Wednesday night Justin apparently scratched Leanna's eye, which I didn't notice until we were at the library. She did start crying at one point, which should have warned me to check her-Leanna's a tough cookie. She doesn't cry over just anything. My Mom came over for about an hour to watch Justin so I could have some alone time with Leanna(the baby was sleeping and Tom was watching tv). Leanna tends to get overlooked a lot because she's much more self-suficient than the boys, so I asked my Mom to let me take her there quickly. It felt strange to just have one child! Anyway, the lighting at the library is very dim, so I couldn't see it very clearly and by the time we got home I had forgotten about it. This morning when she woke up it looked very red and irritated in the corner so I called the doctor's office. She said it hurt a bit, and she covered it while watching tv. Lukily the scratch wasn't a deep one and they prescribed an antibiotic drop just to make sure an infection doesn't develop. So we have to go back tomorrow afternoon so they can check it again. It really cracked Tom up when the doctor asked Leanna to cover the sore eye and tell her how many fingers she was holding. She was testing Leanna's peripheral vision, but I think she forgot at first that she was dealing with a four year old. Sure, she knows how to count but Leanna's counting is not always so reliable.
Doctor, holding up four fingers,"How many fingers are up?"
Leanna,"One, two, three, four....eight!"
Doctor,"Ok, let's try again!"
(Tom sits in the corner, laughing)

ha ha to you, Aunt Laura!

Here's a picture of Leanna showing off a new Old Navy shirt. A man Tom works with(also named Tom) gave us two more bags of clothes for Leanna. So she spent last night trying on various interesting combinations of clothes. (No underwear, but a shirt and bathrobe! A belt, 2 sizes too big on pants that don't need one with boots! Etc.etc)
We've been really lucky with that-Leanna's clothes have always been provided for us. Her baby clothes were provided by a baby shower and as gifts from relatives. Then as she got older we were given my cousin Karissa's old clothes. Plus we've been given occasional bags of clothes from a few other people, relatives or family friends. We've really only had to buy holiday clothes, sometimes not even them! This source of clothes is particularly nice though, because whoever the girl is, she's only a little bigger or older than Leanna, so the clothes are still in style. Leanna gets a kick out of getting Lizzy Maguire clothes because Maree likes Lizzy Maguire. (a Disney Chanel teen show, for those who don't know). So anyway........She wanted Aunt Laura to see that she has a new OLD NAVY shirt(and you don't!)
Oh well, I tried-it won't upload pictures here. I don't know why.

For Mothers of Small Children
Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray my sanity to keep.
For if some peace I do not find, I'm pretty sure I'll lose my mind.
I pray I find a little quiet Far from the daily family riot
May I lie back--not have to think about what they're stuffing down the sink, or who they're with, or where they're at and what they're doing to the cat.
I pray for time all to myself (did something just fall off a shelf?)
To cuddle in my nice, soft bed (Oh no, another goldfish--dead!)
Some silent moments for goodness sake (Did I just hear a window break?)
And that I need not cook or clean-- (well heck, I've got the right to dream)
Yes now I lay me down to sleep, I pray my wits about me keep,
But as I look around I know-- I must have lost them long ago!

overcoming handicaps

Wisdom from Ann Lander's Readers: Overcoming "handicaps" Sometimes we are told our kids will never do certain things. This list says different.

Strike him down with infantile, paralysis and he becomes a Franklin D. Roosevelt, the only president to be elected to four terms.
When he is a lad of 3, burn him in a schoolhouse fire that the doctors say he will never walk again, and you have Glenn Cunningham, who set the world's record in 1934 for running a mile in 4 minutes 6.8 seconds.
Call him a slow learner "retarded" and write him off as ineducable, and you have an Albert Einstein.
Tell a young boy who loved to sketch that he has no talent, and you have a Walt Disney.
Pit her against sexual discrimination, and you have a Madame Curie.
Make him a hopeless alcoholic, and you have Bill Wilson, founder of Alcoholics Anonymous.
Punish her with poverty and prejudice and she may survive to become another Golda Meir.
Rate him as "mediocre" in chemistry, and you have a Louis Pasteur.
Tell her she's to old to paint at age 80 and you have Grandma Moses.
Label him "too stupid to learn" and you have Thomas Edison.
Afflict him with periods of depression so severe that he cut off his own ear, and you have a Vincent Van Gogh.
Blind him and you have a Ray Charles, Tom Sullivan, Stevie Wonder, and George Shearing or Alec Templeton.
Call him dull and hopeless and flunk him in the 6th grade, and you have Winston Churchill.

More Notes on Spirited Kids-more for me than you

As the book says, It is you who helps your child understand his temperament, emphasize his strengths, and provides him with the guidance he needs to express himself appropriately.
I've often wondered, Tom and I are both rather quiet people and I was always a very very patient person. But then I had kids........and I don't know what happened to my patience. It's gone. Here's a guy in the book talking about just that,
"To tell you the truth," he told me, "the 'war' frightened me. Usually I'm a low-key, quiet kind of guy. Competent-little things don't rile me. How my four-year-old could send me to the moon totally baffled me, but he could and he did. "
The book suggests that a lot of the problem is that parents assume the kids are doing things on purpose, when for them it's just their first natural reaction to things. They really aren't trying to be bad or to annoy you. "Spirited kids experience every emotion and sensation deeply and powerfully. Their hearts pound, the adrenaline flows through their bodies. There is actually a physical reaction that occurs more strongly in their bodies than in less intense individuals. They are not loud because they know it irritates people; they are loud because they really feel that much excitement, pain, or whatever the emotion or sensation might be." I think that the idea that the child is trying to be bad or stubborn or irritating on purpose probably influences our reactions as parents a lot more than I had realized.

On giving kids time to adjust to a new situation or place:
"Spirited kids honestly do shift this slowly. They are not trying to be stubborn and make life miserale for you. They need time to adjust."
That one is true for both kids at different times. If Leanna's used to the place and the people there she has no problems. But I've noticed if she's not as familiar with the people and they try to force themselves on her she gets very shy and sometimes is rude to them. With Justin he just needs time to adjust to the new environment, and if he's left alone he doesn't have a problem with the people there-even if he doesn't know them. He is extraordinarily stubborn though, if someone tries to force him to interact he will absolutely refuse. Leanna is extemely stubborn, but I think Justin tops even her!
On energy:
"It isn't that they aren't paying attention or trying to follow the rules, they simply have a need to move......For example, the six-year-old who wiggles around and jumps in and out of his chair while he completes his worksheet is a child with an active temperament. The child who pings around the room and never completes his worksheet may be experiencing ADHD. "
I think Leanna just has a need to move, more than the average child. It's not that she has trouble concentrating. The ants aren't in her pants, they're in her blood!
The book also explains that differences in temperament also fan the flames between parent and child. You can easily misunderstand your child's motivation and be hurt or angry because you see things very differently. (For example-the introspective child who comes home from school and doesn't want to talk isn't rejecting you. They just need time to process the day on their own before discussing it with others.)

Liar, liar, hair's on fire!

So.....the house is quiet, everyone is asleep but me. I'm taking a mini-break from chores and thought I'd write here. Sunday afternoon Leanna set fire to her hair. Ok, I'm being dramatic, she singed away a small section of hair. But still! I had two candles lit, both up high, and Tom was sleeping in his chair. I only went upstairs with Justin for a minute to go to the bathroom. While I was up there Leanna, for reasons known only to herself and Maree, decided to sit ontop of the roll top desk(on the part that actually rolls, not the top of the desk). Maree kept yelling at her to get off the desk before it broke and I came down because I heard them argueing. "What's that smell?!" Singed human hair is not a pleasant scent. Certainly not the one I was going for when I lit the candle. "Leanna! Get down now, now, now!!" Thank god her hair did not actually catch on fire! Or she could have knocked the candle down onto the baby sleeping in the basinet nearby, or just onto the floor causing a fire. So now I know that I have to consider not only how high the candle is placed, but also what possible damages could be, should the candle fall!
And went over with Maree, for the millionth time, to get me or Tom if she's having problems with Leanna. Not to try to play Mommy herself. I don't think she realized that Leanna's hair was in the candle though. At least Maree will have good stories to tell one day......hey! Remember that time your hair caught on fire! Good times, good times......

Scary stuff

Just another reason it's good to have your baby stay with you in the room you give birth in-by the time they take the baby for any tests, you've already spent enough time to recognize your own child. I'm glad my kids look enough like one or both of us that there are no doubts! I can't imagine having to deal with this.......

Jeerawuth Boonyoo and Orawan Chanthong, a boy and a girl who know each other at school, learned this week that they went home with the wrong families when they were born at a hospital in the coastal southern province of Trang ten years ago.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20060110/od_afp/thailandhealthchildrenoffbeat

Continuing the last post......

I'm posting about what I am reading in this book for several reasons. 1. to help me understand and remember what I"m reading better 2. to possibly help other people who deal with my children to understand them better 3. as a reminder to myself of this information everytime I re-read this.
It's nice to hear that you're not alone. As she says, "Being the parent of a spirited child can be lonely. Because they are "more" much of the advice that works for parenting other children is ineffective with spirited kids.......As a result you can feel crazy, wondering what you did wrong and thinking that you are the only parent in the world with a kid who act this way."
This passage really resonates for me:
Your "awakening" might have come with the birth of a second child-one who slept through the family gatherings instead of screaming and let you dress her in a frilly dress instead of ripping at the lace. Or it could have been the birth of your sister-in-law's child, the one who could be laid down anywhere and promptly went to sleep. Your sister-in-law proudly beamed as though she had done something right, while your child continued to fume and fuss, causing all the eyes in the room to turn to you, silently accusing, "What's wrong with yours?" Your intuition has fought the stares and the indictments brought against you, knowing, believing that this child was tougher to parent, but not quite sure if you were right, and if you were, you didn't know why."

Basically the book explains that nature gives your child their temperment, nurture can't change that. Nurture can only teach your child ways to deal with that temperment-both to use it's advantages and to control the disadvantages. Very comforting to someone who has intuitively felt that she didn't cause her children's temperment! And comforting because it gives me hope that I can still do something to help. A valuable lesson even if you don't have a "spirited child."

Spirited kids

Right now I'm reading Raising your spirited child: a guide for parents whose child is more intense, sensitive, perceptive, persistent, energetic. I'd seen it when I worked at the book store, and initially it made me think of Leanna. She's so full of energy-many family members have suggested ADD/hyperactivity. But I really don't feel that is her problem. While she has a lot of energy, I don't really think drugs are the solution for her. Plus I did a tiny bit of research, just enough to check if I should be worried, and apparently if you are hyperactive you also have ADD (attention deficit disorder). That doesn't fit Leanna, as she is able to concentrate on activities, by herself or with me. She has so much energy, it's very hard to rein in!
I tend to be suspicious of any book that offers to cure all discipline problems. At this point I'm at chapter 6, but I think even if this book doesn't help in the way I had hoped, it will be worth it because I'm learning other things from it. About myself as well as the kids. Yeah, plural, kidS. Justin fits the discriptions in different ways also. Oh no, not me, I couldn't just have normal, mild kids!
A lot of it is just about looking at things differently. Calling the kid spirited instead of difficult. Realizing that those same qualities that can be so frustrating can also be used in good ways-ultimately to help them suceed in life. And the idea that you are looking for progress, not perfection. That's a lesson I need. In some areas I am a perfectionist, and when things don't go the way I think they should, I get really depressed. (this is a quality I have noticed in both my sister Claire, and my daughter). I'm really hoping this book will turn out to have some solutions for me.
So anyway, my kids definitely fit the description of "spirited kids." To paraphrase: spirited kids are MORE! More intense, persistent, sensitive, perceptive, and uncomfortable with change than other children. All children possess these characteristics, but spirited kids possess them with a depth and range not available to other children. Spirited kids are the super ball in a room full of rubber balls. The good days couldn't be better.....the dreadful days are another story."
Characteristics:
1.Intensity
2.Persistence
3.sensitivity
4.Perceptiveness
5.adaptability(low)
6.Regularity
7.Energy
8.first reaction-quick withdrawl from anything new
9.Mood

Leanna can be very intense, she is extremely persistant, she's starting to display signs of sensitivity (everything is too tight! Her shoes are too tight, even though I can fit both my hands in alongside her feet, they are too tight!)I'm not sure about perceptiveness yet, adaptability isn't too bad, she is very irregular,her energy is-well, you know. For first reaction she is a mix-sometimes she will jump right in, other times she gets very shy.
Justin is always very very very intense, he is extremely persistant, not sure about sensitivity or persistance yet, adaptability to change is somewhat slow(depends on the situation), he is very regular, he is very energetic(not in the same way as his sister though)he needs a bit of time to warm up in new situations(though he's getting better with that) and his mood goes to both extremes.

update

I haven't had a chance to post much lately. Most of my free time has been spent on the house. We rearranged things again. Tom rolled up the two carpets in the living room and we moved all the furniture and cleaned the whole floor. Plus I've been working on the upstairs some again-I can only do a little at a time, so it takes forever to get anywhere. Tom has been working on the basement. There was an awful lot of junk left down there by previous owners. And he finally put together Justin's scooter he got for Christmas. Leanna loves it. Justin likes it too, but it's hard for him to get a chance to use it because she's always on it.
Timothy and I finally caught Justin's cold. Timothy's started drooling now, so he's probably starting to teethe, oh joy. That combined with the cold is making him very cranky and I constantly have him or Justin in my arms. It really wears you out.
I got a juicer for Christmas and I tried it out last night-I love it. You get a lot more vitamin C (desperately needed right now!) from fresh juice and it's really easy to use and clean. It tastes much better than the frozen stuff I usually have to drink. I looked up the artist who painted The Accolade, (Edmund Blair Leighton) the picture Tom got me for Christmas, and I got hooked on art.com. I spent way too much time just looking at different paintings. I've always been into midevil stuff, unicorns, horses, victorian stuff,etc. and there's a lot there.
Maree's coming over this weekend and she got straight "A"s on her report card. I called korinna the other night to ask if she and Maree worked on scrapbooking. They were supposed to, that's why we didn't have her last weekend. I got Maree a bunch of scrapbooking stuff for Christmas because she's always like mine and wanted to do it herself. I bought her little kid kits for it in the past, but her mom never got her any pictures to do it. So this year I had a bunch of pictures of one of her soccer games we attended printed out for her. That way she wouldn't have to wait for her mom. But no, Korinna said that she didn't do it with Maree because Maree doesn't like to sit down for more than 10 minutes at a time. She said she didn't want to get it all out and then have Maree lose interest. Doesn't quite fit the Maree we have at our house, not that I'm saying she doesn't know her own kid-but to me that just sounds like an excuse! Then she said that she wants Maree to start out doing it with family pictures instead of soccer ones(which means waiting for her Mom to get her pictures again!). I bought her a soccer scrapbook and soccer stickers-it was a theme! And then she kept talking and talking, after about 40 minutes I made an excuse to get off the phone. It's great that she's friendly but I just wanted to ask a simple question-I had other things to do! I will be really ticked off if she doesn't let Maree use that stuff. I know she's capable of working for longer than 10 minutes because I've done things with her here. And I thought it'd be fun for her to do with her mom or me. Kids love crafts. Oh well, I can only do so much.

Bedbug alert

Bedbugs biting their way across the country-gross!

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/10987651/?GT1=7538

Another mess

And Justin grabbed a box of tea I had set on the stove and he ripped open several bags of tea. They weren't individually wrapped. So there was tea all over the kitchen floor......I could post like this every single day, several times.

love the imagination on this kid.......

Leanna ate some hard boiled eggs tonight and she likes to peel them herself. She came running in to me to happily tell me, "Mommy, a duck popped out of the middle and went into the garbage, a real duck!"
So I just said, wow, that's great Leanna. And she went back and ate the egg. Minus the middle.

names-from Dilbert blog again

Posted by: Joel Dowlath January 23, 2006 at 02:56 PM

I know I'm a little late posting, but I always laughed so hard at this guy who was listed in the phone book in Saginaw, MI as Harry Sackrider Jr. There was also a Freddy Krueger. As a side note, I had been living in Indiana for a bit before the last election for governer (like 2002 or so), when I saw an ad coming back for "Posthumous tax cuts" I am so against taxing people once they're dead, so I was like "right on!" Little did I know that the Republican candidate was one Dick Posthumous. Tehehehe.



For all comments: http://dilbertblog.typepad.com/the_dilbert_blog/2006/01/whats_in_a_name.html#comments

Spread the word

Tom finally printed out business cards! If you know anyone doing remodeling, spread the word, he's cheap. When even his customers comment that he's cheap, you know he really is. He's too worried about losing the job if he charges too much, so he makes very little. I am proud to say that he does good work though.
It's a long story, but his uncle is screwing him, so he needs all the work he can get. Who knows, maybe in the long run it will be a good thing as it will force Tom to start working on his own. So tell everyone you know a good general contractor!

sigh

Justin's been going after the sugar lately-eating it straight. There is nothing this kid is not into!

He can be really exhausting.

Ah, memories

On Saturday I got a letter from a law firm saying that I had unclaimed money, about $180, that they could get to me within 3-5 business days, for a fee of about $56.00 Then yesterday I received two more letters about the same amount of money, one firm wanting $37.oo and the other wanting $18! It's money from a company I used to work for, Kash N Karry(owned by Food Lion who owes me the money apparently). It's under the category of wages payroll salary, which makes sense to me because that company cheated you out of pay whenever they could. I bet someone sued them. I used to work a 12 hour day for them every Sunday and never got overtime, they sometimes used to shave hours off your paycheck(I started getting a printout before I left for the day. It was a pain in the butt, but I wanted to make sure they knew I was watching my hours.) They constantly asked you to work extra, they said you weren't allowed a break unless there were 3 other people working in the department, with no warning they left me alone to train two new people all day on our busiest day-as in no one else was there but me and the new people(how do you train like that?), one time I had to keep working because my relief decided to quit and there was no one else in the department but me and it had already been a 12 hour day, and the manager used to make me do inventory and ordering supplies-his job! The manager was a joke-I remember one night when they paid him ($11/hour) to make up a party tray that he walked out of the store without paying for. We did eat good at that job though. The manager would make thick london broil sandwhiches for us(at the store's expense, not that they knew) and other sandwhiches and salads, etc. The assistant manager used to wander away for hours, one time they finally found him at the mall nearby(being paid to be hanging out at the mall!). This job was the worst, and I've had a series of sucky jobs, so I know what I'm talking about. I really hate working for corporations.

Super babies!

So I'm reading some of the comments on a babycenter article. They're always funny-you might get a few people who comment out of a genuine desire to be helpful, and a few who post with serious questions. But the vast majority seem to post out of a desire to brag or to feel better by putting others down. They often sound so rediculous that it's funny. I was reading an article today How can I give my toddler a head start on school? and it's amazing how focused we are today on raising super babies. I'm assuming this is a relatively new thing.
Especially working in the children's dept. at Barnes N Nobles, I got to observe a lot of the things parents do to help develop their children's intelligence. Books, workbooks, "smart" music, all kinds of tools so you can have a little Einstein. I really think that we are taking childhood away from kids. I'm told that to get into kindergarten today kids need to be able to write their names-didn't that used to be what kindergarten was for? I know that the cold war was when the US started pushing kids to learn earlier-out of a desire to ensure we'd be able to beat Russia. That was when they started changing the kindergarten program.
I actually read that kids who start knowing letters and reading early end up at the same level as other kids by second grade. So parents who push their kids to learn this stuff early aren't really giving them a big advantage in school. It mainly takes time away from playing and doing kid stuff. I'm not talking about kids who genuinely want to learn, there are some who are just drawn to it-in that case it's not pushing, it's developing a natural talent. There's nothing wrong with encouraging curiosity. It's when you keep going, even though the child is no longer interested-when you keep them from playing-when you stop making it fun-That's when it is about feeding the parent's ego and not helping the child.

Then there are those who take it a step farther: There's a book out now about a man who developed a sperm bank of genius sperm called THE GENIUS FACTORY by David Plotz.

Imagine a future in which women are inseminated with the sperm of Nobel laureates to help spawn a race of “super babies.” Sound far-fetched? The strange thing is, this weird-science scenario is real, and it’s part of our past. In The Genius Factory, award-winning Slate editor and columnist David Plotz tells the absorbing, unbelievable story of an eccentric millionaire, his highbrow sperm bank, and the surprising legacy it left behind. Back in 1980, tycoon Robert Graham believed America was facing a genetic catastrophe that only the spread of gifted thinkers’ seed would amend. That year, Plotz tells us, he opened the Repository for Germinal Choice, featuring a roster of Nobel winners, math geniuses, prodigies, and star athletes. After producing more than 200 children, the notoriously nicknamed “Nobel sperm bank” shuttered its doors in 1999, leaving a giant question mark as to the fate of its offspring.
He wanted to develop super children-either for the children's sake or for society's, depending on when you asked him. What's wrong with normal kids? It takes all kinds, and sometimes very very intelligent people can do some very very stupid things. People see things all different ways-why lose that? We need our forrest Gumps too! Having a race of mainly superintelligent people would not be as great as people think. I'm not going into as much detail here as i could(time constraints), but you get the idea.
Some posts from babycenter I thought were interesting and relevant to this topic:

Children...the last great daily miracle. I try not to look at parents boasting as a competition, I simply see them the way I feel in my own heart...proud, amazed, over joyed and awe struck by my childs every new move, word or action. I want to yell every one of my daughters accomplishments to the world not because I am proud of me...but because I am proud of her.
I think we all need to be a little gentler, kinder and tolerant of each other.

Each one of our children is the most wonderful, most incredible, and most brilliant person in the world...as it ought to be...and they all have a different way of expressing those qualities. Cherish each moment with them...for our time with them is brief...and when they're all grown, and we're dancing at their wedding, all that will really matter is that we gave them everything we could give them...and that they always know how much they are loved and respected for who they are and not who we expect them to be...and with that I believe anything is possible...

As a former early childhood educator and years of college, you are all right. In these days, it is important to teach your child social skills and the basics for future learning. It's okay to be proud of your children, and every once in awhile BRAG.:) An important rule of thumb, children learn in this order listening, speaking, reading, writing. Remember they still have to learn the sounds, how to spell, when to use punctuation, and a whole lot of other stuff! Teach your children the best way know. The most important thing to remember is to STAY INVOLVED with their little lives. Some of my smartest students were the ones whose parents were involved with EVERY aspect of their lives. Teaching letters, numbers, colors, etc. is important, but developing an individual who is sure of him/herself by instilling a strong sense of self is of the uptmost importance. I see too many adults who always have to prove something; are they really happy? Intelligence is part nature and part nurture; some children will never be an Einstein no matter what you do while others could receive little teaching and be a genius (a genius who surpasses the highest IG score in the world is a bouncer for a living and he's smarter than his neurosurgeon partner). Ultimately, it is not what you know, but how you apply knowledge that makes you intelligent.

I'm a Medical Doctor (Neprhologist) and I started "talking" at 2 years of age; my sister, however, started talking at 12 months and never went past a high school degree. This of course, does not mean that I'm better than her, as a matter of fact she is a very happy, well-rounded individual, but parents out there, be patient, every kid takes his own time. Don't think that because other people's kids do things before your own he/she is slow. Take heart!

I am a former school teacher of 7 yrs and I have a 17 month old son. I read to him every day, talk to him, play with him, etc... He hardly speaks 5 words, yet he "talks" all the time. He is the happiest most playfyl child I have ever been around. We do so many things together and I know he will talk and use words meaningfully when his little mind begins to let him. It's not that I am not impressed by what some other toddlers can "do", but I agree with some on here that learning isn't just about counting numbers or saying colors.

Studies show that by the time 2 children get into the 2nd grade, it is impossible to tell which child came into school knowing their basic numbers and alphabet. So basically, teaching your kids these skills so early might look cute, but it probably won't help much in the long run. It probably just makes us parents feel better about our parenting skills.
I say what's the hurry... Let your baby/toddler be that. They will get it. I have a 4 year old and he loves to be read too, and he has learn things from PLAY!! FUN PLAY. :)He is as smart as his peers that their parents started flash cards and everything else at a early age. :)

I say savor the moment while they are still little, because before long they will be in school all day/every day.

babies don't keep......

I do not have my act together yet after having Timothy. The adjustment between having 2 kids to three was much harder for me than going from one to two. A friend of mine who had 4 told me that after you have the second one there's little difference adding more, but that wasn't true for me. A lot of it is because Justin is still so needy yet, but even Leanna's been more clingy than usual lately. The past few days all 3 have been insisting on sitting on my lap at once. And Leanna and Justin don't easily co-exist in the same small space, so it's a challenge.
Tonight was nice for a change, I managed to get them to sleep, earlier than usual. Not anywhere near as early as it should be, but it's a step in the right direction. The timing worked out right for once! The baby fell asleep and stayed sleeping long enough for me to put the other two to bed, and I managed to get Justin to sleep before Leanna which gave me some time with just her! Usually the younger two act up exactly as I"m trying to put them to bed and I have two screaming boys which quickly turns into one very angry Justin(cause the baby has to come first), and Justin's crying keeps the baby from settling enough for me to put him down and calm Justin. It's a catch-22! We live with a lot of craziness and messiness right now. So tonight I had time to straighten up a little and even get a shower(yes that is exciting!)! It gives me hope that eventually I will get them back on a schedule and have a little more regularity for me too. I just have to keep reminding myself that it's ok for things to be crazy for a while, they're only young for such a short period of time...........

Cleaning and scrubbing can wait til tomorrow
for babies grow older I've learned to my sorrow
so quiet down cobwebs, dust, go to sleep!
I'm rocking my babies, cause babies don't keep!

Huh?

Leanna and I were talking about when she will start school. I was saying that I think she'll really like it because she'll enjoy learning. To which she replied, " Well, I know that I'll really have to learn to climb big trees! Because I can only climb little ones!"

Question for moms/parents reading this

What rules did/have/do you plan to enforce regarding tv? I'm curious.....

Note to Sue's Genes

Dear Genes of Susan L J.,

While there are many wonderful qualities you have passed on to my children; I would like to hearby, formally request that you please lay dormant for a while. Give other genes a chance! We'd like to see a little of Pop-Pop J. maybe, a bit of a great-grandmother or two, possibly a bit of Aunt or Uncle thrown in there.......you know, mix it up a bit. Obviously you are strong and hearty genes-you not only came through in both Sue's boys, but also in each of her grandchildren! But it'd be alright really, if you eased up a bit, let some other genes slide in there! That's all I'm saying! Thank you.

Your daughter-in-law,
Steph

look-alikes

Tom taught me how to finalize the videotapes we make last night, so I was starting to finalize a bunch of videos that have been sitting around. You have to finalize them before you are able to view them in a dvd player. I watched Christmas, memorial day and Leanna, Justin, and Tom's birthday party; I saw part of Tom's cousin's wedding reception-and that tape had a couple minutes of my sister playing with little baby Justin. Wow, I was looking at the baby-it looked so much like Timothy but I didn't think he would have been wearing that outfit at that size. I figured it must be Justin but I wasn't quite sure until I noticed that the video took place at Fountain Hill. I made Tom look at it and he agreed-they're not identical, but man do they look alike! It really surprised me because Timothy reminds me more of Leanna as a baby. Sometime I'll have to do a scrapbook page on comparisons. Like say maybe a picture of Justin along with ones of me and Tom as babies. And maybe one comparing the three kids. When I have time.........ha.
Timothy is a really smiley baby. He tries to talk now, sometimes Leanna insists that he says things to her. It took her a while, but now she really adores him. Although at this point she still says that Justin is her best friend. I love it when she sings to Timothy. She's always singing this song, my heart belongs to you, your heart belongs to me. I don't recognize the song but it's really adorable. Justin will sing Rockaby Baby to him if I ask him to. My children can be so cute!