Another PTO meeting today and I left feeling a little frustrated. When they asked for suggestions for topics to discuss, I decided to answer for once. I don't like to talk in front of people. But I figured I'd give it a shot and maybe we could talk about something interesting for a change. So I asked if they had any character building programs in the school or district. She replied that they have a Foundations of Democracy program (basically how to behave in public) and a bullying program and some individual teacher may discuss any class problems in the AM before they start the day. Not really what I meant. I've been reading this book, Character Matters, and really the theme comes up over and over again in my homeschool/education research that successful education and responsible citizens are the product of families being involved in their children's education. I conclude that families need to be supported-by the community, by public policy, and by the schools. We currently have a system where whatever is considered good for business is good for the school. This often is in opposition to what's good for families. But it can help in the short-term, while hurting us long term, so it's always overlooked. How does this relate? The school is trying in small ways to support families with these meetings. They try to give parents ideas for how to be a better parent to their children. I think that if the school teaches kids to make helping others a priority, with things like charity drives, and teaches about things like honesty, responsibility, etc. that helps to foster a nicer community and helps the children become good people. This helps parents who are often working a job or two and are too caught up in the rat race to spend much time with their kids, much less teach them. But of course, no one commented on it and the teacher dismissed it because they have those things they are already doing. And I didn't get to say what I've just said on this blog. It was too much for that place.
Meetings are extremely small, they have trouble getting more than a few parents to attend. There is always a translator there for the 2 or 3 parents who only speak Spanish. Topics are generally very basic-we're collecting boxtops for education, this class won this contest, these events are coming up soon. And they sometimes try to have a speaker on a topic, the two they've had so far this year have been on getting kids to eat healthy and the obesity epidemic. These are important topics, but they're at such a basic level that they haven't told me anything I wasn't already well aware of. If you read and know how to use a computer, you're probably aware of this stuff or can easily find it if you so desire. When I commented on this to my mother, she asked, well, why do you go then? The first thing I thought of was to set a good example . But the more I pondered it, the more I wondered if there is a good reason to continue going. I'm not learning anything. I can't really contribute much because my thoughts are on a different wavelength than theirs. The teachers are just trying to help parents who are at a very basic level. I am not a typical parent at this school. Info on upcoming events is sent home in a flyer anyway. There are other ways, and things that I already do, that show Leanna that her education is important.
Can anyone think of a compelling reason to keep going to the PTO meetings?
(I am seriously asking-is there something I haven't thought of?)
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9 comments:
Is a PTO Meeting the same as a PTA Meeting?
It has been a long time since I was to a PTA meeting. I believe that is where they discuss things like raising money for the PTA for class trips, parties and anything else they need money for. Also, I believe they discuss problems their child is having in a class or with a teacher.
Questions and concerns about different topics that interests parents with home schooling, I do believe isn't a concern for PTA Meetings. Their concerns are to keep the child in the school system.
Home-schooling has some draw backs in my book. If a child has trouble socializing then home-schooling I feel isn't for that child. But if a child can stand on his/her own feet and learn, while being able to overcome his/her shyness, then I believe home-schooling will benefit.
I wouldn't have benefit from home-schooling if it was offered in my day. I was a loner to begin with, not a follower, so I needed the interaction of the class with the teacher and the kids. I loved doing things together as a group, verses doing things on my own. I enjoyed spelling bees, projects as a group, field trips with the group, and other things we did as a whole. Gym was more fun for me as a group. I hated changing in front of kids, because kids can be so mean, but doing other things together I enjoyed.
So, there is a lot to look in to for home-schooling. The family down the street was home-schooled for many years and I see where they have trouble socializing. The same with the family that lived across the street from me (before they moved). They attended public school, when she pulled her son out of middle school and home-schooled him, because she didn't like the middle school. I noticed that he changed and became very introverted, rather growing. If they would have done that with their daughter, I think that would have been a BIG mistake, because she was all ready backwards and needed the interactions of the whole class. As she grew when she went to high school, she finally opened up and had a lot of friends.
So, I guess it all depends on the child and how he/she learns. I learn better with someone showing me things rather than reading directions. Directions are very hard for me to understand, that is why I can't do different things on this machine. I need to have a person sit with me and show me hand on hand, until I know it by heart.
I hope that was a help for you.
Sue, I love you but you 100% misunderstand me.
I didn't say anything about homeschooling at the meeting-I mentioned IN MY POST that IN MY RESEARCH FOR HOMESCHOOLING, the idea that the best way to have sucessful kids is to have families involved in their children's education. I did not advocate for homeschooling or mention it in any way there.
PTO stands for Parent Teacher Organization. I know what they discuss. You can't talk about your child's probalems in class or with a teacher-that would be for a parent-teacher congerence or a separate meeting with the principal if appropriate.
Also you are severly misinformed about homeschooling and it's purpose, but that's another post entirely.
I guess we both misunderstood each other in this post and comment. You asked the question if they had any classes/programs about building character. I never heard of any school that offers a program to build character. Did you have something specific in mind about that kind of program.
I really never got anything out of the PTA meeting myself. I always thought they were a waste of time with all the bull-crap talking they do. Sometimes it is way over the parents heads. And sometimes it is a click, if you know what I mean by that.
If the only thing you get out of the meetings is frustration then I say don't go. Also, if is not benefiting Leanna's education and school experience then don't go. Do your own stuff at home to work on the things that are important to you.
Also, I know Steph is by far the more educated one on this but I just want to comment to Sue that there are tons of ways to promote social interaction that doesn't involve school...such as a program like The Boys and Girls Club, Sunday school and Youth programs at church, and one thing that I'm not 100% sure of but if you aren't enrolled in school I would hope that doesn't mean you can't play in a sport! Seems to me that homeschooling would be more centered around learning than actual school where kids are more worried about their peers and what they are wearing...
A character building program is simply a program that tries to instill good character in children. Schools adopt programs all the time. For example, Leanna's school is doing a bully-prevention program. They have assemblies, special rules for what to do if you are bullied or see bullying, and they have a small pledge read over the pa system in the morning.
As I said, when they asked for suggestions for topics to discuss at future meeting, I asked about character building programs. I think it would be great to have the kids collect for a children's charity(encouraging them to care for others, and if they get to choose what charity to support it could make them aware of some of the problems out there). Or to have worksheets or assemblies with stories of kids who've made a difference. Take them to websites that show ways kids can be activists or start their own charity programs. Those are some examples of character=building programs the school could adopt. This PTO doesn't have any cliques-the people barely speak or breathe.
Well, I contributed each year to the PTA, but never chose to attend any meetings. We would attend PTA programs periodically, but that was it. I know that over the years parental participation at meetings waned, and as the kids moved up in years, like middle and high school, there's even less parent participation.
Most of the fun programs that my kids were able to be a part of, especially in elementary school were a result of the PTA. They subsidized many of them, i.e. both their 6th grade class trips, most of their field trips, etc. They generally had one or two major fundraisers each year to be able to raise the money to enable these programs to continue.
I have a few close friends who were PTA officers at my kids' elementary school, and they always complained about how few parents attended the meetings.
I guess for me, my choice at participation was to volunteer once a week with a 4th grade teacher. I spent about 4 hours with her every week, helping her with grading, stapling, collating, cutting and sometimes even working with the kids. I did that for 13 years. With the kids others activities, going to PTA meetings in the evenings, just wasn't in the cards!!
Steph, since bullying is a BIG part of kids in schools that is why most schools have a program for that.
Robbie my next door neighbor was bullied so badly when he started the Phillip Lauer Middle School here in Wilson that he wouldn't go to school (he was in 5th grade then). He was so scared to go that the school district had to pay for him to get picked up by a Wilson School van and transport him to Easton School. Ever since then is when they developed a program about being bullied in school. I really think it is important to have a program about bullies, because there are bullies everywhere you turn these days, whether it is in schools or a place you work, or a place you live.
Character building is good too, but most characters are built from home. I feel a person is going to be a wonderful, caring and giving person through their parents or who they respect and look up to. There is a family that have to young boys that set up a lemonade stand for that little girl who lost her life to cancer. Every year their picture is in the paper and the amount they have collected.
Uncle Billy had a friend who had MD and Billy would help him raise money for Jerry Lewis' Kids. I think most kids who have a friend that have special needs, their character seems to take hold to help them in any special way.
Maybe you can ask if their is a child in Leanna's school that Leanna could help in any special way to get her to start a program of building ones character. There is always somebody that is worse off than you and could use our help, or Leanna's help. For instant, maybe she could help another child with reading being she has moved up a level. I know in Wilson their are always students that help other students learn where they are having trouble in that subject. Uncle Billy had to get students to tudor him after school, when he was in the Middle School. That helps build character and it also makes you feel good doing it. I hope I'm coming across correctly on this.
Just to be clear-I had no issue with the bully program. I mentioned it as an example of a program schools do, so you would understand what I meant by a character building program.
Tutoring isn't an option at her age. They have high school students who volunteer to tutor the elementary school kids, and several tutoring programs. The point of establishing a character program at the school would be to help all the kids there, not just Leanna. I would like to think that I do do many things to help her build a good character, many that i've mentioned on this blog
As far as character being something that is taught at home.....Lessons on being a good person begin at home, but are ideally supported in the community-at school, at church, at sport and extra-curricular activities. Unfortunatly I think this is often not the case. Particularly today with the family stretched out the way it is-parents working, sometimes more than one job or considerable overtime, coming home worried about economic woes, living a too fsat pace of life that leaves little time to do things together as a family. And spending time together is how values are transmitted. Not in a speach on how to be a good person, but ny observing how your parents act, especially when no one's watching.
And there are ways to help an entire community become nicer. Have you heard of the experiment where they left wallets containing $50 in local currency all over the world to measure how honest the people were. Some communities proved to be more honest than others. I think Meadeville pa was in the top 10.
No I never heard of the wallet thing, but I could never take something that doesn't belong to me. I have left money lay around my house all the while my kids were growing up and only once we had money taken and it was a friend of John's and John kicked his butt for doing that to me and Chuck. That's one thing I can say John for being not our biological son he protects us as if we were his parents. He has done that from the day he moved in with us at the age of 19. I believe John is a good example of that character thing, Steph. He came from a very unsettled background and I believe from him living with us, he became wonderful man, now that is good character.
I do believe, I think I know, what you are talking about with a character building program, especially with elementary age kids, it is the best time to start building their character before they become an age when they are all ready set in their ways.
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