Reactions-Working through it

So there's been a lot of fascination with and discussion about people's reactions to this pregnancy. We knew about it since before Thanksgiving, but decided not to say anything. Neither one of us felt like dealing with the inevitable reactions. Well, I told my grandmother on Thanksgiving- but I knew she was the one person who would just be happy for us. Not even a slight negative reaction from her. Which I need.
Tom is thrilled. If anything, he was a little upset that my reaction wasn't better. I have very mixed feelings about this. This one truly was a surprise. Tom suggested I take a pregnancy test when I mentioned wanting a burger and he commented that I'd been having an awful lot of cravings lately. I realized that I had, so maybe I'd better take a test, just to be sure. I didn't really expect it to be positive. I even took a second test with the midwives, to be sure it was really true.

Yes, we do know what birth control is and how to use it. Thank you for the concern. We know what causes babies too (Sometimes people oh so wittily suggest that may be the problem). And yes, I am well aware that you can still get pregnant while nursing, even if you haven't gotten your period back yet. I merely commented that it is more difficult when nursing two children. It is different for every person, but there is a certain level that when your hormones fall below because nursing wanes somewhat, fertility returns. Apparently I am really fertile.

I would definitely not have chosen to have a child now. I was just starting to lose the weight I'd gained from the last two pregnancies. I was just starting to feel like I was regaining a bit of freedom again as Timothy was getting older. I don't really feel like going through pregnancy again. We've really been struggling financially since Tom's been working for himself. And I feel like the three kids I already have need more attention. A year or two would have made a big difference. Still, what's happened has happened, so we just have to deal with it and move on. As my grandmother said, it may seem impossible, but you just adjust, with each child. And we will. I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason-so this child was meant to be.

So please please, don't focus on the negative. I do that quite nicely all on my own. I seriously doubt that there's a negative aspect you could mention to me that I haven't thought of on my own. Babies are wonderful, there is so much to welcome about them. I know that Timothy really brings out a sweet side of Justin, very nurturing. And Leanna is really looking forward to holding another little baby. So there are positives to more siblings as well. Seriously I am very hormonal this time and if you yell at me I will cry! So please just be happy for us, and the fact that we're getting the big family we've always wanted.